Yeah, I sacrificed my SD slot in favor of the headphone jack when I chose my Pixel.

Remember when buying a phone meant they added new features instead of taking them away from you? Those were the days.

Your dad is not a phone

The real key to making this work properly is standardized battery sizes. You know, like the AA and AAA standards we’ve had for one hundred years.

I stopped buying Samsung phones because of this bullshit

Fair enough. Demands that don’t appeal in some way to their id, then.

Unddit is one. Also reveddit and pushshift.

When you make up fake science out of whole cloth, it’s easy to make up something to that accords with people’s biases. Actual truth is simply less likely to fall into that category, and more likely to be uncomfortably inconvenient or terrifying. There’s nothing fun about global warming, deadly pandemics, nor microplastic pollution.

Fake news never makes demands on its target audience. Sometimes it says “you are the victim”, or “those people are the problem”, or at the very least, “this is fine.” But it never says “if we don’t get our shit together we and our children face a dismal future.” Instead it always appeals to the greedy and the lazy amongst us.

He already sexually harassed some poor flight attendant, and literally a day before made some kind of stupid announcement about being a Republican as some sort of stupid way to dodge it

Remember to knock it against your mug of grog to get the weevils out before you soak it in there.

Much easier to mine more helium on Earth. We have plenty still at home. The shortage is not because we’re literally running out of what we have on our planet.

A shark killed my brother a few years back. He was just standing there minding his own business and this shark came out of nowhere and toppled a vending machine on top of him. Poor bastard never knew what hit him.

Ok, now wh

Come back to me when they’re fighting in a carbon fiber tube in the middle of the Atlantic.

Or because it was a low effort TV reference, in which case fair enough.

The universe is a cruel, uncaring void. The key to being happy isn’t a search for meaning. It’s to just keep yourself busy with unimportant nonsense, and eventually, you’ll be dead.