To give you an actual answer, and you will probably not like this answer - you eat everything. Eventually. And it won’t end well.

You have only your hands, so you won’t catch any meat. You could try to make tools to make traps or catch fish, but that’s really hard.

For the first week, you probably won’t eat much at all. The hunger will fade after the first 24 hours. But after a few days it will come back, and it will come back strong. You’ll do what babies do - taste everything.

You won’t have tribal knowledge passed down, so you’ll rely on the backups - smell and taste.

Put a little bit of whatever it is in your mouth. If it’s bitter, spit it out. If it makes your mouth tingly after a few minutes, spit it out. Otherwise, swallow it. Wait an hour. If you’re still alive, and feel okay, that thing is probably okay.

You’re going to eat lichen, moss, tree buds, flowers, lots of roots, and strange berries. You’re going to turn over rocks and eat grubs and worms. You’re smart enough to shy away from mushrooms - at first.

Eventually you will be so incredibly hungry, and you will see mushrooms with mouse chew marks, and you’ll think to yourself: “if the mice can eat it, so can I!”. You’ll probably be right, and regardless, the gamble between a new food source and death will seem like a win-win.

Eventually you will get it wrong, and it will hurt the entire time that you’re dying. Life sucks. Your best bet is a few lucky guesses on something relatively abundant so that you can stop guessing.

Longer term, eventually you will figure out those tools you were attempting between foraging runs. Even longer term, you will re-invent farming, and even might not die of a vitamin deficiency. Good luck!

—-

Practical answer: don’t do that. Ignore food. Get rescued. Go downhill. Most of civilization is on the coastlines and/or riverbanks.

And drink the water! If you only have gross water and no way to filter or boil it - drink it. The difference between death by dehydration and death by bacteria is about one to two weeks, which is more than enough to be rescued. The hospital might be able to fix you sick. They can’t fix dead.

r/theydidthemonstermath

r/theydidthemath

I have declared war on notifications. My immediate family, two closest friends, and my boss can call me. In no other circumstances will my phone make a noise or vibrate. I will check my texts when I feel like it.

Other than a few exceptions, no apps may show the notification badge either. Discord will show DMs and mentions from one or two servers. Everything else is blocked. My work email may show unread email. I’ve even turned off banners on my work chat app. I don’t think I’ve checked my personal email in months.

All my recurring charges are paperless + autopay. That’s another notification badge I forgot about - I have a budgeting app that can show transactions. I categorize them, make sure their categories are covered, and I’m done.

On the first of the month, I pay rent and set the budgeting app categories. Then I have nothing to worry about, and near-zero distractions. My biggest pain point in life is deciding what to eat for dinner.

This is absolute gold. To the right person, this comment is priceless. Thank you for typing all this out. This is wisdom right here.

There is no such thing as easy or hard.

Give it a try, fuck it up, and give it a try again. Try not to fuck it up in the same way as the first time. Repeat until it works - it will work eventually.

It took me about 6 hours and 3 disk re-formats my first time. I was particularly bad at it. I barely knew what a disk was, nevermind a partition.

Actually I’m still not sure what a partition is.

You’ll do fine :)

At what point does a collection of microservices become a monolith that uses http instead of a bus 🤔

As “down”, I hereby grant maculata retroactive permission to make the above joke; and formally proclaim that I found said joke to be at least somewhat amusing

At least outlook can right click for spellcheck. Wait, actually it can’t do that.

At least you can download your email attachments to a folder? Wait actually you can’t do that either.

At least the 15-minute meeting warnings still pop up consistently? Oh. Oh no.

“Are you sure you want to post this comment? Would you like to upload to sharepoint and send a link instead?”

No outlook I would not like that, I would never like that

Is my file in onedrive? Or on disk? Or is it in sharepoint? Or it could be in a teams chat - but isn’t that just sharepoint? I sent it to Tom also, but it was already in sharepoint because I had sent it to Jim, so it re-named it to something else. Where in sharepoint are my teams files? Or the teams files others have sent me? Is this actually an attachment on my email or is it a “shared link” in disguise?

I’m not sure what’s real anymore!

I love i2p. I wish it had more adoption / was easier to use.

I have not heard spiritbox, but I have heard that they are similar to Reliqa, who I absolutely love